And BINGO was her name-o!

Michael has always told me that, every year for Thanksgiving, he, his mom and sister would go to what inevitably ended up being an inappropriate movie to see in mixed company. In keeping with their family traditions, we decided to take Becky (Michael's mom, who is visiting for Christmas) to a charity fund-raiser. Inappropriate, you say? Let me elaborate: a charity fund-raiser put on by the Denver Cycle Sluts, a local group of drag queens. What's so inappropriate about drag queens? you may ask. Nothing whatsoever. Until, in addition to the usual bingo fund-raiser, the event includes a pre-show of sometimes naughty, often downright raunchy holiday songs lip-synched by said drag queens.

Regardless, Becky has a great "What I did during my holiday break" story to share. She is in insurance, so we're guessing she'll be the only one in her office with a drag queen bingo story. She even got some flirting from a really drunk guy who, as she later pointed out, was also flirting with Santa.

As for the bingo, it was pretty much your standard fare, though in addition to "basic" five-in-a-row bingo, there were games like "Four hookers, one on every corner." Some games were in keeping with the raunchy theme, and I won't repeat them here. The prizes were nothing too outstanding; one of the sponsors is Coors Light, so there were a few beer signs. There was also a gift certificate to a local store.

I wasn't really too intrigued by any of the prizes until the last one, on "blackout" bingo (cover every square on your card). It was a fairly sizable metal Corona Light cooler that I thought would be a great addition to our back porch come summertime. Anyway, I was down to one number, and three times, people called bingo who had to wear the wig of shame because they called false bingos. They finally called my number, and I went up front to claim my prize. Lo and behold, another woman -- dressed as a reindeer, no less -- had the same numbers. Both sets were deemed good, so it was a bingo-off. This involved one of the drag queens holding a bottle behind his/her back, and at the count of three by the audience, the hand it was in determined the winner -- left for the reindeer, right for me, and it was the right hand!

I won the cooler with two CDs inside, which I graciously chose to give to the reindeer, apparently a sore loser, because as I handed them to her, she said, with her face screwed up all sarcastic, "Thanks!" But I won the cooler. It is a major award, even better than the fraGEElay lamp from "A Christmas Story."

Oh, and in case you're wondering, our camera is still broken; I found this image on eBay, where the same cooler recently sold for $79.95!